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"Each of us must come to care about everyone else's children. We must recognize that the well being of our own children is intimately linked to the well being of all other people's children. After all, when one of our children needs life-saving surgery, someone else's child will perform it. When one of our children is harmed by violence, someone else's child will commit it. The good life for our own children can be secured only if it is also secured for all other people's children. But to work for the well being of all children is not just a practical matter-- it is also right!" - Lilian G. Katz, Phd.

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Like a tiger stalking prey...

When you live in chaos, you frequently look for ways out. There are times I wondered how much I added to it by trying this technique, or that one, instead of just staying the course.

As a result, I am really hesitant about anyone who claims they can 'cure' someone of a neurobiological disorder such as ADHD or Bipolar Disorder. There are multiple causes of these disorders, and while I acknowledge some are behavior and environment, I have also seen the undeniable organic causes as well. I have seen my child slip into a world of hallucinations, delusions, and terror when we titrated his medications, and I remain grateful for the existence of these medications.

I am cautious, however, about amounts and types of medications prescribed. I also recognize the over-diagnosis of the diagnosis du jour, and that frequently there are multiple directions to take to help a child conquer their challenges.

Today I had the TV on as background noise (I don't feel like finding the remote- although Crosswords just came on, so I may have to) and on a local show a counselor was featured. She told the world that all a parent has to do is fill out a questionnaire, and their child's ADHD will be cured. Yes, cured. I have a couple of issues with this. The first is that I want to see her empirical evidence for this, not just testimonials.
Where are her sources? Where is her research?

According to Ms. Fendelman:
ADD, ADHD, Oppositional Defiance are not disorders. They are a result...a normal, adaptive, evolutionary response, to a society that's stuck on the hamster wheel. Bipolar is an indicator that the child may have been sexually abused. There have been over 160 deaths (some of them suicides) related to the use of meds prescribed for ADD/ADHD and Bipolar...time is of the essence. Please call to schedule an appointment or order Jane's book, Raising Humane Beings. You needn't suffer through these challenges alone. Heal your family today!
Now, I have the desire to be snarky, and comment on the terrible code that came over when I pasted that, but I won't. Instead I will descend into rant mode.

Instead, I call bullshit on you. HOW dare you! You are preying on desperate parents to sell your books and promote your counseling services, and may even believe the crap you are spewing. Honestly, reviewing your web site, you have some excellent parenting techniques, and your book may even be good, but what happens when you don't cure a child/family in 3-5 sessions? Do you blame the parent for not trying hard enough? Do you blame the child? Do you write them off as just not getting it?

My child has challenges to overcome, but I have more sense than to buy into curing him. That is the path to despair, and I would rather concentrate on helping him live a fulfilling and active life. We have a team of wonderful people around us who are helping us do this.

Jane Fendelman, if you should read this and wish to respond, I welcome it. I would love to see your research, sources, and empirical evidence your method works. I even invite you to come live with our family for a week or two- it might be eye-opening. But otherwise, I feel like your site and your promises disrespect every parent and child that has to live with these issues.

Now, back to saving my academic career, which has suffered yet again since it started raining blood and bodies.